Practice of stillness feedback: Irina Moskovets
After the end of the second month of my participation in the online club, a few days before the trip to the retreat left.
These two factors cause strong mind resistance, spawn many fears and doubts. However, I was packing a suitcase and ready to go.
Everything has just begun, and this month in the Online Club was very tense.
The minds were boiling and resisting, but I understood the importance of the teamwork. My ego told me that I couldn’t do any task, that all of this seemed ridiculous. But the senior of the team Zhenya wrote that I could, so, in order not to let the team down, whether I wanted it or not, I did it. Sometimes I thought: “This is the limit, I can’t do it anymore, I give up!”. But after talking with the guys from the team, who listened and supported me, I understood that everything was not so terrible, and went further. I began to hear my ego. In fact, it is almost everywhere in all our actions. It was very difficult for me to turn around, as my mind constantly gave its 2 cents.
And now I can say with the full confidence: working with the ego is tremendous work!
I had the most vivid experience in one of the club exercises “Discussion in Circles”. When almost everyone from each circle in the team added something, I realized that only together we can see the full picture. While one by one paid attention only to a single segment.
There was a feeling of unity with all the people walking along the street. There was an understanding that we are all part of the whole, that my problems are not more important than the problems of the stranger. We are all unique and equally important for this world. An On-line club is proof of your readiness to change, will you have enough strength and determination to move further with the necessary speed till the end. Many people could not stand the strain and left. The next very serious test is a retreat.
Unfortunately, not everyone understood they are parts of a united Source of life. Our world depends on the interaction of these particles. If people tried to think sincerely about their motives to perform certain actions, they could see that their ego is in charge of everything. A person’s true purpose is to give back, not self-consumption. That’s why everyone should work with the ego. And this work on mass scales would lead to сompletely different life on the Earth. I have learned a lot I have already experienced so many discoveries and changes. It is hard to imagine what’s going to be next, but I will continue!
Thanks to all the tutors and guys from the School!